Hello, welcome to this episode of Spunky Spirit.
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I am psychic medium Carrie Mugs
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and today we're gonna talk about shadow work.
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And I know I've talked about this before,
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but I need to talk about it again.
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I feel really strongly that I need to talk about again
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because it's something that we work on
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throughout our whole lives.
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It's not just something we do and it's one and done.
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There's always healing to do in our lives.
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And sometimes when we think we've already healed
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from a trauma in our life or something in our life,
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we can go on for years and then go through something
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and have it be triggered again.
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And so that's why we constantly are working on ourselves
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and on our healing and it's not something,
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spiritual growth is not something outside of you.
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Spiritual enlightenment, spiritual power,
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spiritual tapping into your gifts
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is not something outside of you.
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It's always something inside of you.
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And when it's inside of you, it's because you have to heal.
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You have to heal from stuff
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and you have to heal from things that trigger you.
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And even if you had the best childhood ever,
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there's still some things in your life
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that you have to process and you have to get through.
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And this is called shadow work.
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There's lots of things nobody ever goes
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through this world unscathed.
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Even if you're the richest, most powerful, best life,
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there's things inside of your lifetime that you're learning
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because you wanted to learn those things.
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You put it on your blueprint before you came here
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that you wanted to learn and grow
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and spiritual growth is an inside job.
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It's always, always going on.
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And so a lot of times the way you know the difference
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between the dark and the light of healing
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is when you're triggered about something
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or when somebody triggers you about something
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like if you go to a healer and they bring a trigger to you
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or you, and what I mean by trigger is you,
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something comes up again and you feel the feels
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and you feel the drowning or you feel the,
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you know, the upsetness or the tension
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or the anxiety from a dark healer or somebody who's dark,
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the dark doesn't want you to process it.
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They want it to keep you down.
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They want you to dwell on it.
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They want you to, the dark wants you to, you know,
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that's what anxiety is.
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Think about it all the time and dwell on it
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and dwell on it and deal with, not deal with it,
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but just, you know, like constantly think about it
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and dwell on it and not move from it
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and have it hinder you and have it,
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have you stay put, it actually will lower your frequency.
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But if you go to a healer that's a light,
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a healer that is, you know, trying to help
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or trying to help heal, they'll help you deal
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and process the triggers and the anxiety
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and help you feel it, but move forward in it
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and move past it and move more.
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And so that's how you can tell the difference
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between when you do shadow work, the light and the dark,
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because if you're processing it and you're moving it
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and you're raising your frequency, then, you know,
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that's when you, and that's when you know
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you're having kind of an awakening too
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is you want to learn more.
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You want to get better.
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You want to heal.
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You want to raise your frequency.
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If you're like stuck in this, if you're not growing
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and you're not having, you know, there's always growth, right?
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Always, always, always growth, because without growth,
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we wouldn't, without change, we wouldn't have growth.
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And so there's always something to be learning
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about yourself, always something new.
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And the trick is, is to love yourself
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and accept yourself with even all those dark triggers
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and all of that trauma and all of that, you know,
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all of that stuff that you think other people
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don't like about you, you love all the stuff
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that you think maybe you don't want anybody to know
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or, you know, those thoughts that you have sometimes
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that you hope nobody knows about
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or about other people, about yourself, all of that stuff.
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You have to realize that you are not alone
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and that you are beautiful inside and out
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and you've got to love yourself regardless,
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regardless of that and feeling not good enough.
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You got to be happy where you're at
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in what you're doing, because you know
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that there's always progression.
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If you are raising your frequency
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and raising your life, there's always progression.
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Now, awakenings usually happen
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when you're going through some sort of trauma.
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Either you've lost somebody to, you know,
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a relationship or lost them to dying
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or in your grieving, grief causes a lot
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of spiritual awakenings.
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And spiritual awakenings are kind of the start
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of deep night of the soul.
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Spiritual awakenings, you know, are true,
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you know truth, you see truth,
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you see past the lies of people and of the earth
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and all the things and you start to question everything
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you've ever been taught, everything you've ever gone
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through, you start to question it
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and you try to start to heal from it.
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And so that can be dark night of the soul.
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You don't have to go through something super traumatic
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as a child, but even just growing up in a certain religion
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can cause, you know, you could have some spiritual growth
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there that could be triggering because you could be like,
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okay, is this what I really thought it was?
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Is this what I'm supposed to be doing?
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And any type of thing that you've gone through
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that like doesn't let you be authentic
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or in your whole lifetime that you weren't allowed
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to be who you wanted to be,
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that would can cause any type of like trauma response
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or, and I am not a counselor.
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I'm gonna tell you this right now.
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I am not a counselor.
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I tell this to people all the time when I do readings.
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I do not counsel.
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This is just from my own opinion and from what I've seen
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because, you know, honestly, spiritual awakening
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can be very, very, if you are going through
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spiritual awakening and you are going through
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the dark night of the soul,
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I do recommend maybe going to a counselor
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who also understands spiritual sense or spiritualness.
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And because there is a fine line of,
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I always said this between mental health
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and spiritual health.
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And sometimes that line could be crossed.
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If you ever feel like somebody or something
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is telling you to do something you don't want to,
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or if you feel like you're in the dark night of soul
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and you don't want to try and get out of it
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and you stay in that lower frequency,
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you're gonna need help.
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And it's okay to ask for help.
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It really, really is.
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Shadow work is no joke.
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And it sounds scary and it sounds scary.
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And shadow works, I mean, when I first heard of shadow work,
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I thought ghosts and demons and all that stuff
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were gonna come after me and that's not what it is.
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Shadow work is figuring out your own demons,
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your own things that cause you to act a certain way
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or to cause you to not be yourself and who you want to be.
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And because you need to figure out who you are
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and who you are authentically and what you love
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and what you love to do,
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not because somebody taught you to be like that.
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I mean, you think about it when we're born,
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we're given a name, we're given a number
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and we're given a religion
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and we are expected to believe in those things.
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And we do believe in those things
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'cause that's what we're taught.
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And so there's gonna be lots of things
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that happen in your lifetime
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that are not aligned with who you are authentically,
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who you are deep down,
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because those things are just automatically given to you
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and they don't even give you time to grow
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and to expand before those things are handed down to you.
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So as you get older, you might decide
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that's not how I feel or that's not how I feel.
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That's not like, does that make sense?
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Trying to explain it,
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but 'cause shadow work is intricate and it's complicated
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and it's something that lots of people don't know
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don't know how to get through it
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and they don't wanna do it.
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A lot of people will not attempt shadow work
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and I'm just telling you right now,
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if you go to a healer or to somebody
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who you want to help with spiritually,
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you want them to help you spiritually,
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if they haven't experienced shadow work,
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I'm not really sure if they should,
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I mean, if they go from like,
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get the steps of shadow work and all of that stuff,
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I don't wanna, 'cause everybody has to start somewhere, right?
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And I started before I went through a whole bunch
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of shadow work too, but I didn't really dwell on shadow work.
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I just did like, I connected to the other side,
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but now when I talk about this
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or when it comes through in readings
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that you need to process certain things,
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I get it, I get it, I understand it
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because shadow work is no joke
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and I'm not saying you have to go through shadow work.
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I think you got it, I think everybody does.
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Everybody has to go through their own depth
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or their own dark night of the soul,
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their own like, oh my gosh, is this really me?
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Is this really what I wanna do?
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Is this, I mean, question everything
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about their existence and their life
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and how they were treated or what they believe,
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that's where false beliefs come through,
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that's where how you were raised comes through,
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all of that comes through.
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And if there's not a time in your life
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where you don't question that
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or you don't, I mean, it could totally be healthy,
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but you always have to question everything
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and that's a lot of times when shadow work will like appear,
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is when you start to question your own beliefs,
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the things that you were taught
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or the things that you,
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the things that you thought you stood for,
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the things that can help you get through shadow work though,
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our energy work.
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And I'm talking about,
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Akashic record readings and Reiki
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and massages and foot zones,
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type it in bowl massages,
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even readings, any type of readings
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'cause your ancestors can come through sometimes
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and tell you things that you need to work on or process
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and so that kind of will help too,
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but yeah, shadow work is the thing that's hard too
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about shadow work is some people think,
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well, I don't have anything to heal
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and that's also not true
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and I don't want you to create things too,
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'cause if you're like in good mode right now
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and you're like, life is good, life is great,
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'cause I've, you know, when you don't know
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that there's a beyond or there's more to it,
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sometimes you're like stuck in this
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in the matrix a little bit and you don't know
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and so you think everything's fine
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and then something happens and things start to shift
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and you start to question everything,
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you start to question all the things
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that you were ever taught and all of your childhood
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and all the things and that's when everything
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just kind of goes and it's kind of crazy.
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So I'm kind of, I guess I'm kind of talking a little bit
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about awakenings too, because awakenings
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can trigger shadow work because that's when you're like,
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what do I actually believe in?
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Who am I actually?
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And kind of too, when you're stuck in this life
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of just being the same after day, after day,
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after day, after day and you kind of think,
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oh my gosh, do I really exist to wake up
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and go to work every day and come home
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and then do the same thing?
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When you kind of start to question that, you know,
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and there's some people that don't ever question that.
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And I think, you know, I think like my dad,
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I think he didn't, but I think he kind of did
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because I think that that's why he was an alcoholic
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'cause I think down deep, he knew there was something
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different, but he didn't know how to grasp that
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or he didn't know how to find it, and so he would drink.
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And I think that some people are fine,
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just living their lives, going to work
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and doing the same thing every day
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and just living the best life they can.
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And that's great.
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And I think that there's some people out there
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that wanna know more.
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They wanna go deeper and they wanna know purpose
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and they wanna know, you know, what's really the truth
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and what's really out there and is there more?
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And that's when an awakening happens
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and that's when the shadow work starts
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because I mean, when you're in the normal
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before, I mean, there's before awakening
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and after awakening.
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Before an awakening, it's just,
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there's some people out there that believe
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the more you suffer, the holier you are.
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Like you want, there are some religions out there
00:13:06,420 --> 00:13:09,460
that believe that if you, the more you suffer
00:13:09,460 --> 00:13:12,100
and the more trials you go through,
00:13:12,100 --> 00:13:14,100
the more worthy you are.
00:13:14,100 --> 00:13:15,740
And that is not true either.
00:13:15,740 --> 00:13:17,460
That is not true because we are in this world
00:13:17,460 --> 00:13:20,500
that we will find joy and authenticity.
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:22,980
But to get there, we do have to really, really peel back
00:13:22,980 --> 00:13:27,980
and figure out the truth, the truth about our lives,
00:13:27,980 --> 00:13:31,380
the truth about who we are.
00:13:31,380 --> 00:13:32,500
And sometimes that can be so hard
00:13:32,500 --> 00:13:35,180
because it's not what we were taught
00:13:35,180 --> 00:13:38,300
or it's not what we thought it was in our whole belief.
00:13:38,300 --> 00:13:41,300
It's like, kind of like if you're driving
00:13:41,300 --> 00:13:43,100
in the car right now and you have little kids,
00:13:43,100 --> 00:13:45,660
you might want to skip this part.
00:13:45,660 --> 00:13:47,220
But it's kind of like, you know,
00:13:47,220 --> 00:13:49,140
you're taught about Santa Claus.
00:13:49,140 --> 00:13:51,740
You're taught that there's a Santa Claus,
00:13:51,740 --> 00:13:53,220
he comes to your house, you believe that
00:13:53,220 --> 00:13:55,220
and you believe that.
00:13:55,220 --> 00:13:56,060
And then when you find out the truth,
00:13:56,060 --> 00:13:57,060
it's kind of devastating.
00:13:57,060 --> 00:13:58,420
And it's kind of like, okay, what else is not real?
00:13:58,420 --> 00:14:01,900
Is Jesus not real?
00:14:01,900 --> 00:14:03,140
You know, you start questioning other things.
00:14:03,140 --> 00:14:04,900
That's kind of what a spiritual awakening is like,
00:14:04,900 --> 00:14:07,460
is everything you're taught,
00:14:07,460 --> 00:14:09,300
you're starting to find holes in it.
00:14:09,300 --> 00:14:10,900
You're starting to figure out things
00:14:10,900 --> 00:14:12,020
are different than what you thought.
00:14:12,020 --> 00:14:13,980
And it could be in a lot of things.
00:14:13,980 --> 00:14:15,140
It could be in your religion, your government,
00:14:15,140 --> 00:14:16,980
your family, anything.
00:14:16,980 --> 00:14:19,240
And then you start to question other things.
00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:22,300
And you start to question inside.
00:14:22,300 --> 00:14:24,500
And then you start to question, you know,
00:14:24,500 --> 00:14:27,180
why did this happen to me?
00:14:27,180 --> 00:14:28,780
Or why, you know, 'cause a lot of beliefs,
00:14:28,780 --> 00:14:31,180
if something does happen to you,
00:14:31,180 --> 00:14:32,500
like abuse or something in your life, you question why?
00:14:32,500 --> 00:14:36,180
Why did this happen?
00:14:36,180 --> 00:14:37,740
And as soon as you start to question,
00:14:37,740 --> 00:14:39,820
that's when the awakening starts to kind of come through
00:14:39,820 --> 00:14:42,820
and you start to see truth.
00:14:42,820 --> 00:14:44,740
You start to see other things.
00:14:44,740 --> 00:14:47,460
And then you get to process the trauma from it.
00:14:47,460 --> 00:14:51,660
You get to process, you know, the, what do you call it?
00:14:51,660 --> 00:14:56,660
When someone's disloyal, like you feel betrayed,
00:14:56,660 --> 00:14:59,980
the betrayal from all of it,
00:14:59,980 --> 00:15:01,700
the betrayal of what you were supposed to believe in
00:15:01,700 --> 00:15:03,740
and how things were supposed to be.
00:15:03,740 --> 00:15:06,180
That's kind of where you start to grow.
00:15:06,180 --> 00:15:09,260
And then you start to, you know,
00:15:09,260 --> 00:15:11,580
'cause a lot of times when we do have trauma like that,
00:15:11,580 --> 00:15:13,940
we blame ourselves.
00:15:13,940 --> 00:15:14,980
We blame our own selves and then,
00:15:14,980 --> 00:15:18,060
or sometimes we blame other people.
00:15:18,060 --> 00:15:19,980
And, you know, an awakening can be that you take control
00:15:19,980 --> 00:15:24,980
of it yourself and you own it,
00:15:24,980 --> 00:15:27,020
or you realize that it wasn't your fault.
00:15:27,020 --> 00:15:29,180
And it was, you know, they're all kind of different.
00:15:29,180 --> 00:15:31,780
So, so awakenings and shadow work
00:15:31,780 --> 00:15:36,780
can be very complicated and very hard they can be.
00:15:36,780 --> 00:15:41,940
But I promise you, they are so much worth it
00:15:42,980 --> 00:15:47,340
on the other side.
00:15:47,340 --> 00:15:48,820
There's just so much more knowledge
00:15:48,820 --> 00:15:50,580
and so much more freedom,
00:15:50,580 --> 00:15:52,020
so much more freedom out on the other side of this.
00:15:52,020 --> 00:15:54,900
Because you, I mean, I'm not kidding you.
00:15:54,900 --> 00:15:57,420
When I was going through my first divorce,
00:15:57,420 --> 00:15:59,260
I thought it was the end of the world.
00:15:59,260 --> 00:16:02,140
I was devastated.
00:16:02,140 --> 00:16:04,220
I was depressed.
00:16:04,220 --> 00:16:05,620
I was like dark night of the soul, couldn't function.
00:16:05,620 --> 00:16:09,720
And it was just like, there were times
00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:11,900
that I would lay in bed and the only reason I got out of bed
00:16:11,900 --> 00:16:14,500
is because I had four children that I also had to raise.
00:16:14,500 --> 00:16:18,260
And it was so devastating, so much trauma in it,
00:16:18,260 --> 00:16:22,940
and so much, so much just yuck.
00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:26,780
And, but then I got to the other side of it.
00:16:26,780 --> 00:16:31,140
And now, now that I've like learned so much from it
00:16:31,140 --> 00:16:36,140
and become who I am, so much stronger,
00:16:36,140 --> 00:16:39,140
I'm so much just a better person, just awesome.
00:16:39,140 --> 00:16:43,780
And my, you know, and I'm not,
00:16:43,780 --> 00:16:46,380
my kids are probably going through counseling right now
00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:48,940
because of the trauma that they endured from some of that.
00:16:48,940 --> 00:16:51,860
But at the end of it, I'm, I'm, I would do it again.
00:16:51,860 --> 00:16:55,700
I would do it again in a heartbeat
00:16:55,700 --> 00:16:56,940
because I am such a better, stronger, more emotional,
00:16:56,940 --> 00:17:00,860
just an intact person and more confident
00:17:00,860 --> 00:17:04,780
and than I ever was when I was going through it.
00:17:04,780 --> 00:17:08,860
And so much better, so much better,
00:17:08,860 --> 00:17:12,060
so much more me, more authentic and going through that.
00:17:12,060 --> 00:17:16,540
And then also too, when I was going through my faith crisis
00:17:16,540 --> 00:17:20,340
with my past religion, same thing.
00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:23,220
I would so traumatic, so hard, so chaotic,
00:17:23,220 --> 00:17:27,860
so hurtful like every day, like I was just like,
00:17:27,860 --> 00:17:31,980
because you know, you have this huge belief system
00:17:31,980 --> 00:17:34,300
and you think you're going against the grain,
00:17:34,300 --> 00:17:35,940
you think you're going,
00:17:35,940 --> 00:17:37,300
but then when you come out of the other side of it,
00:17:37,300 --> 00:17:38,640
you realize that that was not what,
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:41,340
it's just so worth it.
00:17:41,340 --> 00:17:43,380
I want you to, I want you to know
00:17:43,380 --> 00:17:44,860
that any kind of shadow work you go through,
00:17:44,860 --> 00:17:47,780
any kind of awakening you go through may seem so hard,
00:17:47,780 --> 00:17:51,820
but you're not alone.
00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:52,980
And at the end of it, you are so much more you and authentic
00:17:52,980 --> 00:17:57,980
and your frequency is so much higher
00:17:57,980 --> 00:18:01,340
and your love and compassion and all of that is so much harder,
00:18:01,340 --> 00:18:05,300
your strong, your commitment to who you are.
00:18:05,300 --> 00:18:08,160
And you realize a lot of times you're not selfish.
00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:10,620
What we've been taught so much
00:18:10,620 --> 00:18:12,580
is to put everybody else first.
00:18:12,580 --> 00:18:14,020
And as long as you have compassion,
00:18:14,020 --> 00:18:17,820
you don't have to have that,
00:18:17,820 --> 00:18:19,300
you don't have to put everybody else first.
00:18:19,300 --> 00:18:22,420
You can put you first so then you can.
00:18:22,420 --> 00:18:24,780
You can put your oxygen mask on first
00:18:24,780 --> 00:18:27,060
so then you can help others, right?
00:18:27,060 --> 00:18:29,420
And so, and it's okay if you don't want certain relationships
00:18:29,420 --> 00:18:33,540
in your family and it's okay that you're self-preserving.
00:18:33,540 --> 00:18:38,320
Now, there's a difference between self-preserving
00:18:38,320 --> 00:18:41,280
and punishing.
00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:42,400
If you're eliminating people from your family
00:18:42,400 --> 00:18:44,840
because you're punishing them, that's one thing.
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:47,680
And you probably need to work on that more
00:18:47,680 --> 00:18:49,320
and you need to do some more soul searching on that.
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:53,000
But if you're eliminating people from your life
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:55,720
for self-preservation to protect you
00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:58,600
because there's so much trauma hurt there,
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:00,800
then that's something you need to also view
00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:03,320
and look at because this world is,
00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:07,940
I hate to say this, but this earth is hard.
00:19:07,940 --> 00:19:10,580
Earth can be hard, but the trick is it's like a game
00:19:10,580 --> 00:19:13,780
and you wanna win it, right?
00:19:13,780 --> 00:19:15,500
Like you want to get past, you wanna get past.
00:19:15,500 --> 00:19:18,900
It's like almost like, my son used to play Legend of Zelda
00:19:18,900 --> 00:19:23,060
and he'd go to different lands in the game
00:19:23,060 --> 00:19:28,060
and there was one, the Shadow Castle or something like that
00:19:28,060 --> 00:19:31,460
that was kind of scary.
00:19:31,460 --> 00:19:33,260
But you had to go through it to win the game.
00:19:33,260 --> 00:19:36,440
You had to go through it.
00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:38,060
And so this is your Shadow Castle.
00:19:38,060 --> 00:19:39,800
You have to go through it.
00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:41,280
You have to face your fears.
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:42,520
You have to face all the shit.
00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:44,900
You have to heal your shit and you have to face it
00:19:44,900 --> 00:19:48,240
so you can win the game.
00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:49,800
That's exactly what you gotta do.
00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:52,040
And it's so profoundly worth it.
00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:55,540
It can be scary 'cause I remember the times
00:19:55,540 --> 00:19:58,120
when he'd have to go through the Shadow Castle on the game.
00:19:58,120 --> 00:20:00,320
I would have to go in the room with him
00:20:00,320 --> 00:20:02,040
and sit on the bed because he would kind of scare him.
00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:04,500
It would be, and it was just like cartoonish.
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:06,380
It was like Legend of Zelda.
00:20:06,380 --> 00:20:07,860
It was a game.
00:20:07,860 --> 00:20:09,220
And so that's kind of how you do.
00:20:09,220 --> 00:20:14,220
If you need someone to help you go through the castle,
00:20:14,220 --> 00:20:17,340
then confide in somebody who's not already going
00:20:17,340 --> 00:20:19,780
through the castle and that has the capacity
00:20:19,780 --> 00:20:21,740
to help you go through the castle, right?
00:20:21,740 --> 00:20:23,820
So, but I'm telling you, if you wanna grow spiritually,
00:20:23,820 --> 00:20:28,620
then you have to go through the castle.
00:20:31,380 --> 00:20:33,800
You do.
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:34,640
It's not spiritual enlightenment.
00:20:34,640 --> 00:20:37,080
Spiritual gifts are not an outside job.
00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:39,760
They're all inside.
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:40,640
And when people say that,
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:41,760
they mean you have to go through your shits.
00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:44,680
You have to heal your shits before you can get it.
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:47,320
And that's just the beauty of it.
00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:51,100
Because when you do go through that,
00:20:51,100 --> 00:20:53,120
you get to know who you are.
00:20:53,120 --> 00:20:54,800
And you get to love yourself unconditionally
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:56,920
no matter what you've gone through or went through
00:20:56,920 --> 00:20:59,960
or have done in the past.
00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:01,900
And so that's why shadow work is so important.
00:21:01,900 --> 00:21:04,580
To grow spiritually and shadow work
00:21:04,580 --> 00:21:06,660
and I think in awakening kind of go hand in hand.
00:21:06,660 --> 00:21:08,860
Because I think awakening, your first awakening,
00:21:08,860 --> 00:21:12,200
there's more than just one awakening, I feel like.
00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:14,100
I feel like there's a, the first awakening is like,
00:21:14,100 --> 00:21:16,820
is like rabbit hole.
00:21:16,820 --> 00:21:18,220
Like you're going down this rabbit hole going,
00:21:18,220 --> 00:21:19,500
what the heck?
00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:20,340
The second awakening,
00:21:20,340 --> 00:21:21,580
and then you kind of go through some trauma
00:21:21,580 --> 00:21:22,980
and you heal your trauma.
00:21:22,980 --> 00:21:24,380
You figure out what you're trying to heal.
00:21:24,380 --> 00:21:25,780
And then the second awakening is just,
00:21:25,780 --> 00:21:27,260
I just feel like they're frequency raises.
00:21:27,260 --> 00:21:28,860
That's pretty much what they are.
00:21:28,860 --> 00:21:30,180
Every time you raise your frequency,
00:21:30,180 --> 00:21:32,000
you go through something.
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:33,200
You have to go through something.
00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:34,480
And sometimes it's just about having confidence in yourself.
00:21:34,480 --> 00:21:37,920
Because it could be something as small as you getting teased
00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:41,740
by someone you liked in grade school.
00:21:41,740 --> 00:21:45,120
And that diminishing your confidence to do other things
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:48,900
throughout the whole, throughout the, you know,
00:21:48,900 --> 00:21:50,780
your eternity.
00:21:50,780 --> 00:21:51,620
And I tell this story all the time about my grandma.
00:21:51,620 --> 00:21:54,040
When she was in second grade,
00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:56,120
she went up to the chalkboard to do a math problem.
00:21:56,120 --> 00:21:58,800
And while she was up there doing the math problem,
00:21:58,800 --> 00:22:00,380
her pants fell down.
00:22:00,380 --> 00:22:01,820
And she was devastated because all the kids laughed at her.
00:22:01,820 --> 00:22:04,100
And that followed her throughout her life.
00:22:04,100 --> 00:22:06,780
And for little things,
00:22:06,780 --> 00:22:07,940
like she was afraid to get up in front of public.
00:22:07,940 --> 00:22:10,180
She was afraid she lost her confidence.
00:22:10,180 --> 00:22:12,740
And she didn't ever like to wear loose clothing
00:22:12,740 --> 00:22:15,220
because she was afraid it was going to fall off.
00:22:15,220 --> 00:22:16,940
Just so many things that had affected
00:22:16,940 --> 00:22:18,940
that she didn't even realize.
00:22:18,940 --> 00:22:19,780
And it wasn't even like anybody hurt her.
00:22:19,780 --> 00:22:21,940
It wasn't like she was abused.
00:22:21,940 --> 00:22:23,220
It wasn't like it was just something she carried
00:22:23,220 --> 00:22:25,260
throughout the rest of her life
00:22:25,260 --> 00:22:26,540
that was pretty traumatic for her.
00:22:26,540 --> 00:22:28,460
And it, you know, she was a public speaker.
00:22:28,460 --> 00:22:31,600
She was like the county treasurer.
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:34,200
And it affected her for the rest of her life.
00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:38,000
So just little things like that.
00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:39,440
And you don't know,
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:40,720
you don't know what you don't know until you go through it.
00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:42,960
Until you go through the shadow work
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:44,280
and figure out where it came from.
00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:45,800
So when you do get triggered and you're like,
00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:47,360
why is that making me so mad?
00:22:47,360 --> 00:22:48,560
Why is this bothering me?
00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:50,560
And you figure out and you go down the process.
00:22:50,560 --> 00:22:54,160
This is bothering me because of this from so long ago,
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:58,400
that's like 90% of the healing, right?
00:22:58,400 --> 00:23:00,880
90% of the healing.
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:02,120
And sometimes you think you know where it came from
00:23:02,120 --> 00:23:04,500
or you think you know, okay,
00:23:04,500 --> 00:23:05,740
I feel like this because of this,
00:23:05,740 --> 00:23:07,600
sometimes it could be something completely different.
00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:09,720
Now I'm not telling you to create shadow work.
00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:12,340
And I'm not saying, okay,
00:23:12,340 --> 00:23:13,900
so if you're in a spot right now
00:23:13,900 --> 00:23:15,860
where things are good and you feel good,
00:23:15,860 --> 00:23:17,620
keep going, keep going, shadow work will find you.
00:23:17,620 --> 00:23:20,320
Honestly, shadow work will find you
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:22,340
because you'll go through something
00:23:22,340 --> 00:23:24,000
and you'll be like, oh my gosh,
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:25,140
why is that bothering so much?
00:23:25,140 --> 00:23:26,280
Why am I getting depressed right now?
00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:27,780
Why am I doing this?
00:23:27,780 --> 00:23:29,220
And it's because that's,
00:23:29,220 --> 00:23:30,540
so shadow work will find you.
00:23:30,540 --> 00:23:31,840
So if you're fine and everything's great right now,
00:23:31,840 --> 00:23:34,280
keep that up.
00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:35,320
If you're in a happy, you know,
00:23:35,320 --> 00:23:37,800
everything is blessed, the kind of going on right now,
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:40,440
just stay in there.
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:41,560
Stay in that happy moment for as long as you can.
00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:44,480
Don't go looking for shadow work.
00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:46,820
I mean, you can always like look to heal.
00:23:46,820 --> 00:23:49,180
You can always like look to heal,
00:23:49,180 --> 00:23:50,320
but when you, and you can go,
00:23:50,320 --> 00:23:52,800
I feel like everybody needs counseling all the time,
00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:54,920
whether they're not going through shadow work or not,
00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:57,280
but because that's that, you know, that crutch
00:23:57,280 --> 00:24:00,860
that you can help, that helps you get through the castle.
00:24:00,860 --> 00:24:03,580
But yeah, if you're good,
00:24:03,580 --> 00:24:05,680
if you're in a good place right now
00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:06,860
and everything seems really good,
00:24:06,860 --> 00:24:07,860
then don't go mess with that.
00:24:07,860 --> 00:24:09,100
Don't go mess with that.
00:24:09,100 --> 00:24:10,000
Just enjoy it while it lasts.
00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:12,820
And then when you do go through a time
00:24:12,820 --> 00:24:14,540
when you're like, what's wrong with me right now?
00:24:14,540 --> 00:24:16,400
Why am I feeling like this?
00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:17,580
Where is this coming from?
00:24:17,580 --> 00:24:19,100
Then start looking at where that goes.
00:24:19,100 --> 00:24:21,020
And if you like, there's a pattern of that,
00:24:21,020 --> 00:24:23,780
then maybe start looking where that comes from.
00:24:23,780 --> 00:24:26,140
So yeah, shadow work's a complicated thing.
00:24:26,140 --> 00:24:29,320
And you can find lots and lots of stuff online about it,
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:32,060
but there's no way,
00:24:32,060 --> 00:24:34,140
I think there's even books written on it,
00:24:34,140 --> 00:24:35,580
but there's no 100%.
00:24:35,580 --> 00:24:37,960
This is the right way to do it.
00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:39,940
Shadow work is like different for everybody.
00:24:39,940 --> 00:24:42,640
Healing is different for everybody.
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:44,080
I heal by talking about it.
00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:46,200
Some people heal by doing, you know, energy work.
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:51,120
I'm very visual, so I have to, you know,
00:24:51,120 --> 00:24:54,800
process it that way.
00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:56,380
And lots of people are different.
00:24:56,380 --> 00:24:57,740
So there's no right or wrong way to do it.
00:24:57,740 --> 00:25:00,780
As long as you can get through it
00:25:00,780 --> 00:25:03,040
and be able to like see things
00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:05,340
and have it not bother you or cause anxiety
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or cause intrusive thoughts,
00:25:07,820 --> 00:25:09,300
as long as you can start working on it
00:25:09,300 --> 00:25:10,980
and know why those things happen,
00:25:10,980 --> 00:25:13,420
then it will eliminate,
00:25:13,420 --> 00:25:14,500
it'll start eliminating those things,
00:25:14,500 --> 00:25:16,900
the anxiety or the intrusive thoughts, the depression.
00:25:16,900 --> 00:25:19,460
And then it will be like you'll come out
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on the other side of it.
00:25:21,620 --> 00:25:22,740
And it's just like, you know, there's things I feel like now
00:25:22,740 --> 00:25:26,220
that I, you know, that divorce thing
00:25:26,220 --> 00:25:28,020
that I was talking about,
00:25:28,020 --> 00:25:28,900
I feel like I've like healed from it.
00:25:28,900 --> 00:25:30,320
I feel like I've moved forward.
00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:32,240
But then when my kids kind of go through
00:25:32,240 --> 00:25:34,280
some of their healing process summit,
00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:36,540
it pulls other things out that I'm like, oh yeah,
00:25:36,540 --> 00:25:39,960
I remember that and that does bug me.
00:25:39,960 --> 00:25:42,920
And I need to probably process that because,
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,320
so shadow work finds you when you're ready for that.
00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:50,180
So there's some things that I've already processed
00:25:50,180 --> 00:25:52,860
for different things, like for the divorce,
00:25:52,860 --> 00:25:54,980
there's some things that are already processed,
00:25:54,980 --> 00:25:56,620
but now spirit may think, okay,
00:25:56,620 --> 00:25:59,180
now she's ready to process this part.
00:25:59,180 --> 00:26:01,140
So don't go looking, don't be like, okay,
00:26:01,140 --> 00:26:03,740
I want to process everything for my divorce and do it now.
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It will happen throughout your lifetime.
00:26:06,260 --> 00:26:08,240
Just know what it is when it comes, right?
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I guess that's what I really want you to know.
00:26:10,500 --> 00:26:12,660
It's a lifetime experience.
00:26:12,660 --> 00:26:14,620
And just know that it's not gonna be a one and done thing.
00:26:14,620 --> 00:26:17,340
And it's gonna happen throughout your lifetime.
00:26:17,340 --> 00:26:19,180
And you can think you've already processed something
00:26:19,180 --> 00:26:22,860
from a trauma that you had,
00:26:22,860 --> 00:26:24,460
and it will come up again later.
00:26:24,460 --> 00:26:25,980
And that's okay, it's because you weren't ready for it then,
00:26:25,980 --> 00:26:28,500
but now you are.
00:26:28,500 --> 00:26:29,820
So, and just don't go looking for it,
00:26:29,820 --> 00:26:32,980
because even if you go looking for it,
00:26:32,980 --> 00:26:35,460
like let's say I want to go in and say,
00:26:35,460 --> 00:26:37,460
okay, this is what happened during my divorce
00:26:37,460 --> 00:26:39,140
and I want to heal from it right now.
00:26:39,140 --> 00:26:41,940
Well, spirits could be like, okay,
00:26:41,940 --> 00:26:43,180
you can heal from this part of it,
00:26:43,180 --> 00:26:44,220
but you're not ready for this part.
00:26:44,220 --> 00:26:46,420
So that's kind of how it works.
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It's just a whole life, it's a whole life.
00:26:48,380 --> 00:26:52,660
There's lots of castles in the game
00:26:52,660 --> 00:26:55,060
that you're gonna have to go through.
00:26:55,060 --> 00:26:56,500
And just know that it's part of the process.
00:26:56,500 --> 00:26:58,740
And every castle that you go through,
00:26:58,740 --> 00:27:00,900
every dark castle you go through is gonna be so worth it.
00:27:00,900 --> 00:27:03,260
As long as you raise the frequency,
00:27:03,260 --> 00:27:04,940
the thing is, is don't stay in the castle.
00:27:04,940 --> 00:27:07,580
Don't stay in that dark castle.
00:27:07,580 --> 00:27:09,380
Don't stay in there with the shadows.
00:27:09,380 --> 00:27:10,940
Don't just conquer the castle and then move forward.
00:27:10,940 --> 00:27:15,940
And keep going in the bright sun,
00:27:15,940 --> 00:27:18,020
like Zelda and go to the other farms and the villages.
00:27:18,020 --> 00:27:20,700
And then when you come across another castle,
00:27:20,700 --> 00:27:22,780
go in and process it and then move on to the next one.
00:27:22,780 --> 00:27:26,280
So I hope that's a good analogy.
00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:28,340
I don't know.
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It's just that I want you to know that you're loved
00:27:29,180 --> 00:27:32,660
and you're not doing it alone.
00:27:32,660 --> 00:27:33,980
You have so many ancestors with you
00:27:33,980 --> 00:27:35,660
and so many spirit guides.
00:27:35,660 --> 00:27:37,460
They're helping you the whole time during this.
00:27:37,460 --> 00:27:40,780
And it is hard, but it's also something that you,
00:27:40,780 --> 00:27:45,540
you felt like in spirit before you came here
00:27:45,540 --> 00:27:47,460
on your blueprint that you wanted to experience,
00:27:47,460 --> 00:27:51,300
that you needed to process.
00:27:51,300 --> 00:27:52,980
So some of these castles could be from past lives
00:27:52,980 --> 00:27:55,460
that you don't know about too.
00:27:55,460 --> 00:27:56,740
That's why Akashic Record readings are kind of awesome too.
00:27:56,740 --> 00:27:59,780
So some of those, some castles are from stuff
00:27:59,780 --> 00:28:04,460
you've gone through on this earth and this lifetime.
00:28:04,460 --> 00:28:06,260
And some of those castles are from past lives,
00:28:06,260 --> 00:28:08,420
but usually they're parallel to each other.
00:28:08,420 --> 00:28:11,220
They're usually if the castle's a past life castle
00:28:11,220 --> 00:28:16,060
or trauma or shadow work,
00:28:16,900 --> 00:28:19,260
then it's because it's affecting you somehow
00:28:19,260 --> 00:28:21,460
on this lifetime.
00:28:21,460 --> 00:28:22,300
They don't usually pull a past life trauma
00:28:22,300 --> 00:28:25,140
or a past life castle and put you through it
00:28:25,140 --> 00:28:27,380
if it has nothing to do with this lifetime.
00:28:27,380 --> 00:28:29,700
So if the past life has something to do with this lifetime
00:28:29,700 --> 00:28:34,360
or a lesson that you wanted to learn,
00:28:34,360 --> 00:28:36,100
then it's gonna come here in this lifetime too.
00:28:36,100 --> 00:28:39,620
So I hope that makes sense.
00:28:39,620 --> 00:28:41,580
I hope you guys, like I say though,
00:28:41,580 --> 00:28:43,940
everything you need is already inside of you.
00:28:43,940 --> 00:28:46,300
The trick is is to not,
00:28:47,140 --> 00:28:48,680
you can't rush spiritual growth.
00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:50,620
You can't say, okay, I wanna be psychic and be psychic.
00:28:50,620 --> 00:28:54,540
You've got to work on it.
00:28:54,540 --> 00:28:55,780
It's something you've got to work on constantly all the time,
00:28:55,780 --> 00:28:58,060
just like if you wanna lose weight and have a toned body,
00:28:58,060 --> 00:29:01,020
you gotta go to the gym all the time.
00:29:01,020 --> 00:29:02,500
You gotta work on it.
00:29:02,500 --> 00:29:03,580
And this is something, your spiritual growth, your healing,
00:29:03,580 --> 00:29:06,780
is something you gotta work on every day, every day.
00:29:06,780 --> 00:29:09,500
And it's worth it because it's you, right?
00:29:09,500 --> 00:29:12,140
And you're worth it.
00:29:12,140 --> 00:29:13,060
So it's something you need to work on every single day
00:29:13,060 --> 00:29:16,060
and it's not selfish and you are loved.
00:29:16,060 --> 00:29:20,300
And the trick is is you need to figure out
00:29:20,300 --> 00:29:22,220
how to love yourself.
00:29:22,220 --> 00:29:23,540
And I know that's so cliche, but it's such the truth.
00:29:23,540 --> 00:29:26,400
You gotta learn how to know that you are good enough
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:28,840
and you are worthy and you are loved
00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:31,980
and you're loved unconditionally.
00:29:31,980 --> 00:29:33,780
And it doesn't really matter by who
00:29:33,780 --> 00:29:35,440
because you need to love yourself.
00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:38,160
So regardless of all the castles that you've been through.
00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:41,460
So I love you guys so, so much.
00:29:41,460 --> 00:29:44,260
And I do have a gallery coming, a gallery reading
00:29:44,260 --> 00:29:47,380
in Idaho Falls coming up on April 26th.
00:29:47,380 --> 00:29:50,300
I know in Kerry Connects I said August,
00:29:50,300 --> 00:29:51,860
but I met April 26th.
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I also have a spirit guide.
00:29:53,260 --> 00:29:55,860
I know, meet your spirit guides class coming up
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on March 29th in Idaho Falls.
00:29:58,340 --> 00:30:00,000
I am working on doing some of these classes online,
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:03,140
but we're working that out.
00:30:03,140 --> 00:30:05,420
So I love you guys and I will see you next,
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not next week, but the week after that.
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